My dreams involving Justin Bieber, Britney Spears and “The Naked Lunch”

I never remember my dreams. This is particularly annoying as I like surrealism.

Alright, sometimes I do remember my dreams, but only, maybe, once every six or eight months when I actually get woken up while I am in the process of having a dream.

I just looked at some of the search terms people used yesterday which led them to my blog. If I could put these search terms into a dream and remember it, I would be a happy man.

The fact that people found my blog using these search terms slightly unsettles me. On the other hand, it makes me feel I may be getting the right mix.

These are all genuine….

_________________________________________________________________________________

bbc south today

kathryn blair injunction

crash have you ever tasted semen

ikea edinburgh hot dog

charlie drake man in the moon

i wanna drink my mother’s milk porn story

rupert murdoch custard pie stunt

scottish passport

wierd cock

iraq war hidden porn

good questions to ask comedians

how to find a literary agent for book about jesus christ

i guess i’m not the only shambolic person

how much is johnny vegas worth

is it true that hitler had a twin that was a comedian?

germans love indians

did suggs from madness appear in a gangster film

is mr methane married

mamma mia hermaphrodite

ann widdecombe’s breasts pics

princess margaret boxer

dave courtney launches anti-gun campaign

ikea fetish ad

john fleming blog

how to write an edinburgh fringe press release

ed miliband is a slimy grease ball

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I also want to know what these people were actually looking for. Most of them stumbled on my blog.

What is the “iraq war hidden porn” story?

What is the specific “i wanna drink my mother’s milk porn story”?

If anyone can pull all those search words together into a novel, he or she could become the next William Burroughs.

The Huffington Post tell me that they only really want 7-13 ‘tags’ on their stories because any more and you tend to get lost on Google searches. I have always thought “britney, spears, farmyard, sex, justin, bieber” are probably the ultimate tags most likely to get lots of stray hits.

I shall still keep putting lots of tags on my blogs here but perhaps try the short Britney Spears approach today.

1 Comment

Filed under Comedy, Internet

One response to “My dreams involving Justin Bieber, Britney Spears and “The Naked Lunch”

  1. John,
    I’d just like to tell your readers that I’m not married.
    Yours flatulently,
    Mr. Methane!

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