No 1: THE LEWIS SCHAFFER PRESS RELEASE
Jewish comic recommended by a Palestinian
A fortnight ago, Lewis Schaffer sent out a press release:
“New York Jewish comic Lewis Schaffer has landed a Palestinian sponsor for his five star Edinburgh Fringe show Lewis Schaffer: You are Beautiful.”
Yesterday, he followed this up with a press release headed: Lewis Schaffer to crowdfund for his hit Edinburgh Show.
It began:
New York Jewish comic Lewis Schaffer is crowdfunding for his Five Star Edinburgh Fringe show Lewis Schaffer: You are Beautiful.
In yet another attempt to come up with new revenue streams, Lewis Schaffer has entered the world of crowdfunding.
Already this year Lewis Schaffer has accepted sponsorship from a Palestinian-owned freight company that serves the Middle East, now he has set up a crowd funding site.
Benefactors of Lewis Schaffer’s campaign will get the following rewards:
Purchasing one £10 ticket gets you one ticket to Lewis Schaffer: You Are Beautiful at Just the Tonic Community Project, Five Stars in The Scotsman.
Purchasing two £10 tickets gets you two tickets to Lewis Schaffer: You Are Beautiful at Just the Tonic Community Project, Five Stars in The Scotsman.
Purchasing four £10 tickets gets you four tickets to Lewis Schaffer: You Are Beautiful at Just the Tonic Community Project, Five Stars in The Scotsman.
Purchasing ten £10 tickets gets you ten tickets to Lewis Schaffer: You Are Beautiful at Just the Tonic Community Project, Five Stars in The Scotsman.
Purchasing 100 £10 tickets gets you 100 tickets to Lewis Schaffer: You Are Beautiful at Just the Tonic Community Project, Five Stars in The Scotsman.
No 2: ELLIS & ROSE’S BEGGING LETTER
Ellis & Rose gave Copstick a red letter day
This week, I was shown a red letter – literally a red letter – by Kate Copstick, the most influential comedy critic at the Edinburgh Fringe. It read:
Dear Copstick,
We’re writing this letter to try to convince you to review our Edinburgh show this year, because we can’t afford a PR person and our hard-working producer is doing our PR (and everything else) for free – but she obviously has no clout because we’ve had no press stuff in the run up to the Fringe – not that anyone really reads that bollocks anyway.
We have worked really hard on making our show this year and we think we have a chance of impressing you enough to beat the three star review you gave us in 2013.
Love x
and sexy kisses
Ellis & Rose
They added a cartoon drawing of Copstick’s head saying A FLATTERING PORTRAIT OF YOU
No 3: THE LOUISE REAY FORTUNE COOKIE
Whatever will be performed wholly in Chinese
Yesterday was my birthday.
An anonymous letter arrived with my name and address scrawled on the envelope.
Inside the envelope was a sealed red sachet.
Inside the sealed red sachet was a Chinese fortune cookie.
I broke it open.
Inside the fortune cookie was a very small piece of paper with the printed message:
Do not clip your toe nails at night,
in case you are visited by a ghost.
You must enter The Caves,
Just Up The Road at 3.20pm.
It is your destiny. Que Sera 些拉 ?
That was the message in its entirety.
SO IT GOES - John Fleming's blog 